Today, just be nice!
It’s a great way to build and enhance any relationship, especially the one with your life-partner.
And keep doing this. We’re curious to know about the results you create.
Archive for the ‘All posts’ Category
Just Be Nice
Monday, July 11th, 2011How to slow down in life
Monday, June 13th, 2011Do You Ever Backpaddle in Your Relationship?
Life can seem really hectic at times – rushing here, rushing there, plowing through the day. Ever experience that?
It’s worth the effort to backpaddle, slow down and enjoy the ride. Check out this metaphor.
When are you going to do it?
Do you have strategies for slowing down, so you can really enjoy your relationship and life? We’re curious to know about them.
Messy Pile-up Of Feelings
Tuesday, May 10th, 2011This video was done a few weeks ago, however the message is very valid any time of the year.
Do you ever have negative feelings about your partner? Do you talk about them right away?
Or do you bottle them up inside until you’ve got a messy pile-up?
Here’s one thing to do to eliminate the challenge. And you can do it!!
What are you going to do with your piles now?
What Do You Want? – Part 2
Monday, April 11th, 2011This is Part 2. If you missed Part 1, check it out here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZ-IveCFIdw
We often ask our coaching clients, “What do you want in your relationship?” A blank stare is often the response.
It can be exceptionally helpful to determine what you want in your relationship, and then apply a simple secret – give it away. In other words, give what you want the most, and you will likely receive it in direct proportion.
Give kindness; receive kindness. Give respect; receive respect. Give the gift of real listening; others will listen to you.
Isn’t it time to commit to this age-old Truth – with a capital “T”?
Give it a try and let us know what happens for you.
Dan & Carol
What Do You Want?
Tuesday, April 5th, 2011What do you want in your relationship? Ever really thought about that?
When we ask that question of our coaching clients, we often get blank stares, or total quiet on the other end of the phone.
Most of us can easily spout off all the things we don’t want and don’t like – and those are usually the things we see and experience regularly.
What might happen if you and I really got clear about what we DO want in our relationship? What might happen if we focussed on how we really want it to look like, sound like, and feel like? What might happen?
Here’s the first of a two-part blog about just this.
So, what do you want? We invite you to send us a note – we’d really like to hear from you.
Unload Stress – Do A Brain-Dump
Wednesday, March 30th, 2011Sometimes life can seem so hectic. Do you ever feel overwhelmed?
Studies indicate that a persistent feeling of “overwhelmedness” leads to all kinds of physical, mental, and social disorders – dis-ease. I don’t want any of that, do you?
Here’s how to unload stress by getting all of that stuff off your heart and mind. Then you can choose the 1 most important thing to do. Just one thing at a time.
Give it a try and let us know how it worked for you. We’re curious to know, because we care.
Dan & Carol
Growing-Apart Syndrome
Wednesday, March 23rd, 2011What the heck is the “Growing Apart Syndrome”? More importantly, are you caught in it now?
With our busy lives, with work, business, kids, community duties, etc. it can be easy to become so “busy” that you may forget to take the necessary time to just “be” together, even if you don’t say anything.
This video will give you ideas of “1 thing” that you can do to eliminate/reduce the Growing Apart Syndrome.
What’s your perspective? Please let us know.
Have a super day!
Dan
What D’ya Mean, It’s Not Your Nature
Tuesday, March 8th, 2011I’ve got the best job in the world. I get to work with people, to help them enhance their relationships. It is so much fun. Whether we’re working with a company team, an individual, or couples, it’s always different. There are patterns in interactions, and patterns in thinking habits, but each individual is unique. And there is always something for me to ponder and learn.
Something came up recently that got me scratchin’ my noodle.
We were coaching a married couple and asking them about what they wanted in their relationship. She said she wanted them to be more demonstrative with each other: to hug and kiss; to touch each other in loving ways; to hear the words “I love you”; etc.
He chuckled and responded with the old phrase, “I told you I loved you 20 years ago. If anything changes, I’ll let you know.”
When asked about ways he could be more affectionate, he said, “That’s not my nature.” In other words, it was not comfortable for him.
I was intrigued and it poses a great question for me, and for you. What is your nature?
Quite honestly, when I think back (way, way back), I believe my nature is to eat, drink, sleep, and poop. That’s what I was born to do – it’s my nature.
You too?
Then I did some uncomfortable things like learn to crawl, walk, ride a bike, and drive a car. They were not my nature. And I went to school to learn the “readin’, writin’, and ‘rithmatic” – not my nature. I figured out how to get along with people (a wee bit), to hold down a job, and to start several businesses – not my nature. I got married, became a parent, and started to drink coffee – not my nature.
And as I think about it, there are a ton of things that I do regularly that are not comfortable, and some of them I may not even enjoy – they are not my nature. But I do them anyway because they help me to live a happy and joyful life.
You too?
How did it turn out for the gentleman referred to previously? He decided that he was willing to do some things that were not his nature, they were even a bit uncomfortable at first. Why? Because he saw the value for him; to experience more happiness and joy in his relationship with his wife.
So my question for you is this: To live a more joyful life, what are you going to do, today – something that is not your nature? Want some ideas?
- hug your life-partner at least 10 times today
- hug a friend or colleague
- give kind words of praise to a child
- send a love letter by snail-mail to your lover
- genuinely compliment the attendant at the gas station
- address a waiter or waitress by name (it’s on their name badge)
- offer a ride to a stranger
- call your parents on the phone just to say, “I love you.”
- start an exercise program
- commit to reading a good book
- call someone with whom you’ve had an argument, and apologise
- invite a friend for lunch (and buy it)
- learn to meditate
How hard and uncomfortable would it be to do one, or all of those? What other “not my nature” things could you do that would add joy to your life immediately? What might be the long-term benefits when you choose to make some of these things habits?
I believe that ultimately, my nature and your nature is happiness. And it’s the moment-to-moment choices you and I make (some of them hard and uncomfortable) that allow us to experience happiness more and more.
Do you want to honestly say that you’ve got the best job, the best marriage, the best relationship with your kids, your colleagues, your friends? Or would you rather whine and complain and say that life sucks?
What’s your nature? It’s a choice you get to make.
Accountability in Speech
Tuesday, February 22nd, 2011Accountability – Hmmm?
Accountability is a buzz word that we all hear, use, and know about. But do you truly apply it, especially in your speech?
This is not meant to be an English lesson. However, are there ways to design your sentences in a way that is accountable, and so they don’t push other’s buttons – especially your life-partner’s? Here’s one thing you can do today!! Can’t you?
How can you apply this in your relationships at home, and at work?
We’re curious to know.
Have a Super Accountable Day!
Dan & Carol
Do One Thing
Wednesday, February 16th, 2011Do you want to improve your relationship with your life-partner? Even just a bit?
You don’t need to buy anything or go anywhere. All you need to do is ONE thing today. Just for today, do one nice thing for your partner. Do just one thing that shows you care. Do just one thing that is helpful.
It doesn’t matter what, just one thing today to show your partner you love him/her.
What are you going to do TODAY? Please let us know.
