How To Get De-befuddled: And the results when you do

Ever been in one of those befuddled places in your life?

  • Confusedstuck-in-a-rut
  • Uncertain
  • Overwhelmed
  • Drained
  • Withdrawn
  • In a rut

Dang, it can be … uncomfortable, scratchy, prickly. And it affects everything – family, work, community. It can be a negative spiral, leading to apathy, resentment, bit…iness, resistance. Yuck!!

OK, don’t go there now. If you are like most people, you’ve been there – or maybe, just maybe you’re there now.

One of my Personal Mastery Coaching clients was in this spot recently. Her major concern for our call was community commitments. She wanted to know how to get other people engaged and enthused about some of the projects in her community.

Through our call, she became acutely aware that what she was seeing outside of her, in the community, the school, their business and her family, was a reflection of what was going on inside of her. It is sometimes referred to as the Mirror Theory.

What was she seeing?

In the community, the focus was on having effective meetings, planning projects and getting the business done. At school, the teachers were focussed on getting their lesson plans delivered, supervising and reporting. At home the focus was on getting the harvest complete, meals ready, clothes washed, homework done and obligations taken care of. The main focus was to keep checking things off the list. It seemed that everyone with whom she related was approaching life the same way, “Just gettin’ by.”

The awareness of the reflection in her mirror was that a significant component of “thriving” was being pushed below the surface. She was forgetting the “why” of it all – the big picture. And she was forgetting to honestly feel and express the feelings that give her life substance and make it rich.

Emotions began to flow as she shared that she was wanting affirmation and acknowledgement for her efforts, and very much wanted support in her commitments.

She expressed her realization that she could start right away, at home, to make a big step toward thriving, by giving away what she wanted most – to give an abundance of affirmation, acknowledgement and support to others. And in doing so, it would be easy to ask others for help – to work together. Her realization was that the BIG foundation of it all is Love. By committing to this, she was making life more fun and finding ways to celebrate the joy in the journey.


Here’s the picture she drew to remind her of her path.

So, my friend, what about you? What’s going on in your experience of this journey?

What are you seeing in your life?

What is your bigger picture on this journey? What do you really want? I invite you to write it down and reflect on it.

Who are the stakeholders in your game? What do they want?

How can you thrive by giving away what you want and give it to others in a way they want to receive it? I invite you to go ahead now and draw a picture.  It adds power and commitment.

Thinking about this and projecting 3 months, 6 months, 12 months out into your future, what are the results as you do that consciously and consistently now? Imagine and pretend how it feels for you.

How are you going to continue to thrive and celebrate – everyday now? What will you use for a reminder?

On this same theme, I invite you to check out Give a little; Gain a lot.

It’s time to get de-befuddled, don’t you think?  I’d love to hear your perspectives.

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